Well yesterday was my day in zit heaven. All the stars must've been aligned and the gods were smiling down! My son let me at his back!! I don't know how many of you have read my profile but I state the agony of having a 20 year old long haired son with backacne who REFUSES to let me "pimp" his back. (dunno why,but we've called it "pimping" ever since he was like 10. Like,"please let me pimp your back? "NO!-lol.Just a little background info) Anyhoo,he came home after work yesterday and took his uniform shirt off and sat on the couch next to me to talk. Naturally I had to ask if I could pimp his back and he actually shrugged his shoulders (which have zits too-lol) and said "OK". OMG,well I didn't waste a moment and got into back pimping position (sitting behind him on the couch and fixing the lighting) and surveyed the joy in which I was about to indulge in.
 Oh the joy,the anticipation. First off he has hair to down the middle of his back,so I pulled the pony tail holder out of my hair(I couldn't waste precious time looking for a seperate one) and gave him a high pony to get the hair totally out of my way. Now I was ready. I eyeballed the field of blackheads,whiteheads and cysts.Now,knowing my kid I was aware that he could bolt at any time if he felt the slightest bit of pain so I started with the blackheads that I knew would succumb easily to little pressure. The funny thing is that with him only being 20 his skin is actually soft and firm and the blackheads come out quite easily. I notice that sprinkled amongst the blackheads he also has various freckles and moles. Well I start going to town in the middle of his back and am delighted as go about my work and am getting great results. You know,the deep blackheads that are dying to get out. As I'm going along I realize that some of the "blackheads" I'm squeezing are really moles. I kept avoiding this one huge mole fiquring I better not waste any squeezes as he is prone to take off. Imagine my suprise when I accidently squeezed a mole and a long,black squirmy blackhead emerged! I was so suprised I actually gasped.It took 3 long pushes to release all it's contents. It actually curled around my index finger,it was almost the full length of my finger with a huge black head that got yellow and smelly as it emptied.
 As I kept pushing I was noticing that the "mole" next to it was also breaking free...OMG 2 huge blackheads at the same time.
 He had delightful whiteheads on his shoulders.Those I had to proceed with caution. He starts to get grumpy and will leave if they hurt too much. He had a big whitehead on his left shoulder that I knew needed a good hard squeeze but he would never consent so very sneakily I got a lancet(those little pins diabetics use to get blood to test blood sugar)and ever so gently inserted just the tip into the juicy white mountain of pus that needed to be released. I held my breath figuring as soon as he figured out what I was doing he'd jump ship.But he was goofing around my laptop and I kept him preoccupied with idle chit-chat as I pricked the white mountain and a little blob of white pus oozed out! I was so excited to see what was about to be unearthed.But I wanted to enjoy this rare moment and I knew if I squeezed hard he'd be out of there and I'd mss my chance.
 So I used both index fingers and pushed from afar as some pus slowly leaked out.Hmmmm,no reaction from the kid.I closed in a little closer to the main opening and a bigger,thicker blob emerged and still no reaction. So I went in for the kill. Both index fingers and both thumbs circled the mountain and I pushed firm and steady. At first nothing happened but just as I was about reposition my stance a big thick glob of gooey yellowishness exploded out and onto all 4 of my fingers. It was chunky and thick and just needed one more push to finish it off.Luckily the kid still remained unaware.So I took one last breath and squeezed downward not inward and the last of that puppy just exploded out.It even touched the palm of my right hand.(if you can picture that!)Perfect end to the demise of that zit.Actually I think it was a cyst. Well,that last squeeze tipped off the kid as to what was going on and as I showed him the palmful of pus that I got out he stood up,yanked down the pony-tail I gave him and hightailed it out of the room!Ahhhh...oh well. That gave me enough memory to live off of for another year or so! 
    Thanks for your patience in reading this guys.I hope I gave the experience some literary justice.

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